Why the title? Like because I'm not in love, I just care a lot. Why hopeless? Because I am, how could I like someone when everybody says that he's not what I should think of him. They say that he's not what you may call a normal "guy" if you know what I mean. Why do I force the idea that he's not like that? Why do I insist that he's still an opposite sex? Because I believe it.

Many say he's not a man, many say he's gay. Many insist that he likes men, rather than women, but I don't want to believe that even though there are instances that I should believe it; but I still look for hope that those things aren't true. Oh how I wish they weren't. Why do others make it an issue when you treasure your friends that much? An it so happens that your friends are guys.

What's real nowadays... What's man? What's woman? I don't understand, and it makes me confused and troubled on why things can't just be the way they should be, the way they ought to be naturally. I hate the fact that this question just poses much more questions to come eventually. Why can you be just you.

Even though I keep it so much inside, I can't stand others saying that your gay, coz' your my friend, and I just don't want my friends to be like that... I know that its selfish to say that, but all I can actually really do is wish that your weren't. But if you were then, I guess, there nothing I can do about it. I'm not saying this just because I like you, but because I... I don't know... sadly, I get frustrated with my friends turning into the 3rd sex... bad noh? But what can I do? It's in my system. I have nothing against gay people, it's just their being gay that troubles me and not them being people.